Monday, December 1, 2014

We All Want to Die, Just be Patient

Everyone in this godforsaken pit called Tucson is just waiting to die or to find inspiration to do it themselves. From my friends and family to my barber and colleagues. What the fuck are you waiting for? Do you think your life is going to get any better moping around or drinking yourself to sleep? How about you actually try to get the job you want or find the love you need or indulge in whatever will make you happy.

Everyone is struggling, you think I don't want to die? Nearly every time I pass a bus or drive by a car going fast I think about turning my steering wheel and letting it end. But that's such a waste. I've got a book to write, a past to atone for, family and people who are counting on me. And you do too, you've got things all of us need you for. You have things all of us want you for.

Don't give up, don't give in yet. Somewhere between now and the time you actually die is when you're going to feel the most alive. Sometime between love and after heartbreak you'll meet your future partner. Sometime between between hello and goodbye you'll have your most interesting conversation. It's all on the horizon. Want to join me chasing the sun?

If you can't run I'll definitely walk with you. And if you can't do that... Maybe someone could help me carry you? I'm not giving up, I'm not giving up on anything or anyone. We're all worth it, we all deserve the very best and we can all find it. If we try to. Give into your desires and admit what you want, that's the first step. Then start running.